just amazing...

...how God organizes things. I had often heard people sharing their testimonies how just in the right time smth happens. Some that made me think - OK, but it will never happen to me - were stories about finance - like when you really need some
money and you can't imagine there is a possibility to get it and then
somethinghappens. Just accident? Maybe, but Christians now that there aren't such thing as just an accident.

Ok, why I am telling that - 2 days ago first time in my life I used
overdraft and the next income were expected only in the middle of December
(if everything goes OK). I am not used to be in debt but I am not going
to ask money from my family as well. So paying bills, food, transport..


Of course I didn't feel good in such an situation but the oddest thing - I was worried about that 2 month ago when I saw that something like that is going to happen. Only then I thought it will happen
in a month but I have lived so far. And now when I saw that I am really
close to the situation when I am without money, I just found out that
tomorrow or day after that I will receive a scholarship for 2 months!

Just in the perfect time - when I really
need that money and just amazing that is the sum I need to live tillfebruary (when I go away)

And one more time I have to say - that is amazing to realize how God
organizes things. I can't believe that it is just an accident. When I
trust Him that He will take care of me, He did! That is a wonderful
feeling.

Zako-place

Here is something more from this summer. A picture showing those cute cabs of Zakosciele.



Now the documents are ready and the EU is ready to finance this project so (if nothing really changes), then in February I will go back there for 7 months. Hard to believe that! :)

Yeah, I know I want that. Still there are million things that make it hard - studies, job, home, friends... Luckily there are two million reasons that makes it easier. One of them - I really want to experience that and if not now, then never. If already now it is hard, later it would be impossible :)

balloons again

Sometimes it is great to come over your fears and see the results. I have been afraid of making smth out of balloons, more precise - the fact that they can blow in my hands.
This summer I got over that and learned at least some basics. Now I have also teached that to some kids. That's great! :)

Are ideals dead?

Where are the people strugling for their ideals? Why are they thought to be syupid and naive?

Maybe I am stupid and I can say for sure that I am naive because I believe there are some things that are worth sacrifise. Things that are so important to you that you can give up prosperity or anything you have. Otherwise I think people just believe in that prosperity not the ideals they claim to follow.

Idealist. Naive. Happy with that.

I don't understand

I heard a story about one men. He said:

I got a message and a horse. I killed the horse and weren't able to deliver the message.

He was enthusiastic and eager but died young.

I was thinking and can't come to any conclusion. OK, you should care of yourself, but... BUT

BUT I think many people are just caring about saving that horse, not delivering the message

Sometimes I feel that I spend too much of my energy and there is nothing much left. But isn't that the only way that you can feel that you are really doing your best to deliver that message? I don't know. I am confused... :(

a recipe for joy

a pack of butter
some flour
apples picked from the garden
suggar
cinnamon
some cream and cottage cheese

mix it with a dot of love, cover with care and wish to help

serve with a time you are ready to spend together

It makes joy and strengthens friendship. It relieves pain and helps you to see the pleasure of small things that makes a day brighter.

youth work

More experience
Less enthusiasm
That is the balance this year.

New school year has started and we need to plan what to do with the youth work (activities for young people) in our church this year.
When I joined the church, the youth activities I had an oportunity to participate were great way how to grow in faith and how to learn many things. Now - after almost 5 years I can't just sit and see that nothing happends. Everybody just say - oh it would be good if something would be done. But nobody has time or will to do something.
Luckily, there is a girl that has agreed to take the leadership and I am ready to help her. So tomorrow we will have a meeting also with other people that could do something.
We have tried to do something like that also last year. Results: there was a team meeting. But when we came to real action - for most of the persons there were more important things to do. Ok, I know that people are busy but it is so sad to be taken away with some idea and to see almost no support from others :(
Last year was hard. I think the quality of this work was below the one I dreamed about and it really took a lot of efforts and steeled some hours of sleep. But it wasn't fruitless. I know there are many gains we can't imagine but there were also we could see - there are at least one girl who has strengthened her believe and I think that youth work helped.
So for this year.. Everything in front of us. All possibilities :)


Our logo. Made by Edzis

consequences

One thing leads to another. Simple but amazing thruth. I think about some great things and opportunities I have today and I have them because some time ago in the past I have met some people, we have talked about something and.. So it goes on. We hear some offer and always there is a choise - to say 'yes' or 'no'. And the consequences of that decision to accept something or not - those can be seen maybe only after years.

I love the oportunity to study what I study (hm.. if I didn't have bad mark in economics many years ago that caused me to prove the teacher that I can do better - would I have felt in love with this subject?)

I love the work I am doing (I don't know if it is a really good job, but I love it. It's something close to my dream job - I am a research analyst. It couldn't happend if I wouldn't left my previous job that was good but not close to my dreams)

I love Proem and I would really like to spend 7 months there serving youth and children. I don't know if it is possible but anyway I had a great experience this summer and hope to go back there again. Maybe all my lifre would be different if before 5 years in one youth meeting one boy Lauris wouldn't share his experience - spending a summer in the USA in the child camps. Then I first realized I want to do something like that. Lauris isn't alive anymore. But this one meeting and conversation changed a lot in my life.




Thinking. Every thing, every choise leads to some consequences.

Most of the time we don't know what the consequences would be (ha, is that something new??) No. I even don't try to say something new. I am just amazed sensing and seeing at leat something from this big picture.

...in an open palm

I wonder what will happend next? In this one day I have experienced great happiness because of hearing 'congratulations' - I am selected for a job I really wanted to do. And then - just a couple of hours later suspence and doubt if everything can be solved in the way that I would be able to do that work (oh, 'just' technical problems).
I was thinking about the idea one my friend Maris was teaching - you are receiving things from God. Say thanks, but still keep them in an open palm - ready to give them back to Him.
I thought - ouch, yeah, I am ready to give that gift I was excited about back to Lord, but why should that happend so fast - already IN THE SAME DAY???
Now I have solved those problems (I hope so), but I'm not so sure that everything will just manage to be without difficulties. I don't know what will happend next. I think I will need a lot of chocolate and even more prayers.

Step by step

There are moments when you don't know what will happend next and what is worse - it is hard just to take a deep breath and wait. B
During the last camp we had hiking in the night and we had 3 torches for 6 people. I hadn't mine so in the forests I had just to follow others that tried to show the way. On the road it was easy - just to take the direction and walk - full of trust and hope that there won't be any pits in the road. In the forest it was much harder. There was no road, even not a normal path. Trees were fallen not only all around but also in our way. Branches of the trees were everywere hitting the walkers and rushing in our heads, pouring water into the eyes.
But we had to walk to reach the destination. At first the unusual situation paralised me and I thought it is impossible to walk if you don't see almost anything! But then step by step I learnt to trust other persons. I just grabbed one my friend Gunda by hand and followed her. Step by step. Not knowing what will follow, not knowing where we are and what is in our road. Step by step. And we made it! After a long way and many hours we reached the finish and felt both exausted and happy for those things we have done.
ut that is how it is arranged - we can learn to trust God who is way smarter than we are and that sees the big picture. There are many changes in my life right now and I don't know what will happend next. I am affraid to be hurt if I make some wrong move but in the same time I don't want to stand where I am just because I am scared of mistakes. So I grab His hand and move - step by step. Not knowing where the path leads and what is in my road. Step by step trusting Him and following where He will lead me.

I need support...

It is great to see all these Christian families that even go to mission trips all together. I think I would be excited to have parents and sibligs like that.
I have a nice family, but... There is a little but. They don't really support my wish to participate in different christian events, and the idea to go on trip that could be called a mission for 7 months... yeah, that really is something my dad rebuke me for EVERY day and he says that he will do ALL his life! I still have more than 6 month before going (if I go, I hope so) and that means EVERY day full of condemnation.

The question my parents always ask: 'what this trip will give YOU?' And I can't explain them that not always we need to look for some good things for ourselves but for some great things you can do for OTHERS. Mentioning that I want to spend these 7 months serving God would have even less results because then they just thought I am crazy.

But I don't want to waste my life and after 10 years remember this possibility and be sorry for not doing the way I wished. It will be hard but I have made a decission.

Great song

Back home?

...but where is my home?

I spent 3 weeks in Poland, Zakosciele in one Christian centre. There were 3 different camps and I met many wonderful people. I miss them.

That time was amazing. It is great to see the blessings God gives through different people. It is great to hear the preaching of His word and to be part of that ministry.

Something more from these camps can be found in two blogs:

fishart.blog.com
interkosz.blog.com

Right way, wrong direction?

I would like to share something more from our trip to Sandby. To get there from the airport in Nyköping we rented a car. We had a good map as well and we were really glad that already with the first try we found the right way E4 that we have seen in a map like the way we need to take at first to go to the direction we needed.

Everything was great - the sun was shining and we had a great new car. We even had found E4 without getting lost somewhere in the city. After some kilometers one girl eventually asked - we are on the highway E4, but do we drive the right direction? We became stiff for a moment - hey, that is a really good question! As we found E4 we turned right without thinking. Maybe we should have turned left instead? So we tried to explore the map to find out if we have made a mistake.
The place we needed to reach is in the South but we were driving to the North in the direction to Stockholm instead! So we turned around and drove back but stopped to really examine the map and to find out were we should go.
Yeah, Sandby is to the South but to get there we should go to the North at first and the in one large crossroad take another direction. So we hadn't made a mistake at first but then when we thought that we have made a mistake and tried to fix it.
In that situation if we have a map we have a great advantage to stop for a while and search the right way and the right direction in it. Sometimes in our lives we have some questions and have to make some choices but we can't find a map that would show the way. That reminds me about one idea expressed in the book Live Life on purpose I have mentioned also before. There is said that more than a map we need a compass that always shows the right direction.

There is way, so which direction should I take?

Sandby, Sweden

There is a little village Sandby in Öland, Sweden. We, a group of five people, visited this place to meet children and teachers from Latvia that are spending three weeks there in a rectory in a camp. We have visited them also previously in a center where they meet after school but now there was a possibility to spend some time together in a place far away from home.

that place where we stayed

I think we had a great time. Sandby is really nice quiet place. The sea isn't far away (but after this time I star to appreciate the seaside in Latvia - here at least it is cleaner and there aren't so many seaweeds). But there are some things that are really nice - those desert places where you can see far ahead and there are only some junipers.

it is nice there

With those children we had some trips with bikes and also some hiking. I enjoyed also talking, playing cards and just spending time together. I hope these children will enjoy this time as well and see and experience that there can be a different life and better living conditions and more caring and loving relationships than they maybe have at home.

Children enjoys the sea

we come back from the sea

So we came home, they will stay there for another 10 days and what next? Will it be the same again? Luckily there is that center for children Sirdsgaisma where they try to help different children also coming from harsh conditions.

Don't make a living - make a life

Samuel Zwemer has said:

"Don't make a living - make a life!"

Sometimes it is tempting to strive for things that doesn't count. Maybe they seems great in a place and time we are now but they would be nothing after 10 years, they would be nothing in eternity.
So I hope and pray to learn more how to make a life - real, true life not just a living.

What dreams may come

Today I watched a film What Dreams May Come. It is a bit confused fantasy story about love that survives anything, also death. There are things that seems silly in this film but it surprised me and made me think about the question - what could it look like in the other place (not Heaven). I don't know exactly, but one thing I know for sure I truly don't want to be there, moreover, I don't want to see there my beloved and friends.

The philosophy of this film isn't exactly in line of my believes but I think there was a great reflection of the joy when a person is saved and will not perish any more. That is amazing moment that has consequences in eternity. It makes me think how do I lead my life and can I be a tool how others come to Christ and be saved. As one of my friends once wrote - her job is hell depopulation. We are just a tool but still it is our decision if we want to be used for this job.

YBH

I have heard about one Russian man that after reading some books opened the first page and wrote there three letters. If translated to English they could be YBH.

There are a lot of good Christian books in many languages. Sometimes there is a feeling that they are written on every topic you can imagine. So you can read one, then other but how that changes your life? If there is some changes that leads you closer to God and helps you to understand Him more, you can be happy. Still, usually remains a feeling that they are not written for me but for somebody else that has a different experience, different knowledge and different amount of faith.

So if we return to the topic YBH, what does these three letters mean? YBH. In Latvian the first letter is "J" and as I have asked children to guess what does it stand for, of course, every would say "Jesus". That is the correct answer for all the questions in Sunday school and other places where people talks about God, right? Not this time.

YBH - yes, but how? These letters express the feeling that all the ideas written in a book can be approved but there isn't said anything about the ways how they can be realized in our everyday life. That is the reason why there still remains a question - yes, but how? YBH.

I can't give some super - formula for every case but I can encourage you to think about this YBH question and not to put good ideas aside just because you don't know how to use them in this moment. Keep in mind that YBH question and be tireless searching the answer.

Olympic torch

There are some times all you can do is dehydrate yourself crying because you can feel that there has been some great changes in your life. Maybe you feel wrecked but you know that these changes were necessary and that your life will never be the same again.
I have experienced that several times. I can't say that it happens too often but there are some cases.

I am reading a book Live Life on Purpose by Claude Hickman and there is a story about the Olympic torch - a great tradition of the Olympics. One runner pass it to another and that is a way how it travels all around the world. It would be something incredible if somebody lost that torch or would just think it is not worth running and giving it to the next person.
It is the same with the message about the Christ that has died for our sins. You hear the message and it is up to you what are you going to do next. Are you going to live a life as nothing has happened? Will you put that torch aside and say that you will pass it later - after finishing some school, after finding some really cool job or just in a time when there will be more free time?
It is up to you. But the importance of this message is even higher that the importance of passing on the Olympic torch not to spoil one tradition of the Olympics. It is a question of eternity. If you have received that joyful message you know how it can change both the life on Earth and the way how you pass eternity. There are many people that still haven't heard that message.